Making sense of what Ah Beng wrote to Ah Lian

There is no doubt some people are making fun of those who speak Singlish (made famous by Phua Chu Kang) or Manglish, and took the trouble to create some purported conversations between Ah Beng and Ah Lian (these names got famous too):

Dear Ah Lian,

Thanks you for your letter. Wrong time no see you.
How everything? For me, I am quiet find.

You say in your letter your taukeh soh want you to chain your look?
Somemore you must wear kick kok soo, hope you can wok properly.

You know, Ah Kau Kia working in a soft where company now.
Last week, he take I, Muthu & few of his friend to May Nonut to eat barger.
After that he take we all go to kalah ok.
Muthu sing and sing no stop until the sky bright.

Next week, my father mother going to sellerbread 20 years Annie wear sari.
My father mother going to give a fist to all the kampong people.
So you must come with your hole family.

I only hope one day we no need to write and send letter to you and to me.
Better I e-meow you, you e-meow me. I will ketchup with you soon.
And when you got time, please few free to call me. Goo bye.....

Worm regard,
Ah Beng


Translation/correction of spelling/intended words, for the benefit of those unfamiliar with Singlish/Manglish:

Wrong - long
quiet – quite
find – fine
taukeh soh – Hokien for lady boss
chain – change
somemore – furthermore
kick kok soo – kick kok (sound of high-heeled or leather shoes)
wok – walk
soft where – software
May nonut – McDonald
barger – burger
kalah ok – karaoke

no stop - non-stop
sellerbread – celebrate
Annie wear sari – anniversary
fist – feast
kampong – Malay for village
hole – whole
e-meow – email
ketchup - catchup
few – feel
goo bye – goodbye
worm regard - warm regards




Link