Being a Malaysian is the best because...
1. World's tallest twin towers, Best F1 circuit, largest roti canai, most expensive toll rates, because Malaysia Boleh!
2. We can be driving, picking our nose, cursing another driver, talking on the handphone, adjusting the radio and bribing the traffic police at the same time.
3. We can get a divorce by sending just an SMS.
4. Traffic summons can be settled on the spot with the traffic police.
5. We can have Teh Tarik & Roti Canai on the Russian space ship.
6. We can save a lot of electricity because our TV shows are so crappy.
7. We can blame everything on the haze or George Soros or government or the opposition parties or...
8. Resourceful City Council, one person to drive the van, one to carry the ladder, one to change a street's bulb and three others watching...
9. Most drivers can make 2 lane trunk roads into 3 lane highway and back to 2 lanes when police are sighted
10. There's always something for the JKR/TNB/TALIKOM/SYABAS to do. They dig, resurface the road, dig and resurface...and blame each other for bad co-ordination.
11. All main roads are designated highway because it gives Samy Velu a reason to collect toll.
12. Our government can never be wrong or dishonest.
13. Our badminton players are paid only RM35,000 when they win a major international tournament which is very cheap compared to David Beckham.
14. You can easily get a divorce and marry a young singer you like.
15. We can even use C4 explosives to bombard Gengkis Khan or Kublai Khan's great grandchildren.
16. We have more water than Singapore .... nyek nyek nyek.
17. If you have no money you can always snatch other peoples' money since police can't do much to help.
18. If you are the police, doesn't matter about the traffic rules, it's for citizens only
19. If you are a police outrider you can kick and bang peoples' cars.
20. If you drive a police car, you don't need seat belts. You can speed because speed limits only apply to citizens.
21. You can settle your summons with big discounts during "Sales Malaysia".
22. All motorbike riders can join the recognized & supported Mat Rempit Club for free and can beat up anybody in their way and can even throw stones at the police station anytime they like.
23. If you got nothing to do, join Rela and go to the kongsi gelap & extort monies from all the foreign workers.
24. You can rape people and blame them for wearing very little.
25. You don't need to bother about the poor when you race in your F1.
26. You can keep your money and get a free degree when you have 'connections'.
27. You can get work done with 2 hours lunch break, 2 hours tea break, 2 hours with God and the rest of the time attending meetings.
28. You get free "bumi" status if you swim from Indonesia.
29. You can change your sworn Statutory Declaration anytime.
30. You can be a pedophile by "marrying" your young bride.
31 . A country so free to do things you like. Tell me which country is like ours.
32. Oh, I forgot....our Christians cannot pray to Allah.