You have two choices in life:
You can stay single and be miserable,Or get married and wish you were dead.
When a woman steals your husband,there is no better revenge than to let her keep him.
Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life
thinking they had no faults at all.
At a cocktail party, one woman said to another,
'Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?'
'Yes, I am. I married the wrong man.'
First guy says, 'My wife's an angel!'
Second guy remarks, 'You're lucky, mine's still alive.'
A young son asked,
'Is it true Dad, that in some parts of Africaa man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?'
Dad replied, 'That happens in every country, son.'
A little boy asked his father,
'Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?'
Father replied, 'I don't know yet son, I'm still paying.'
If you want your spouse to listen and
pay strict attention to every word you say -- talk in your sleep.
A Woman's Prayer:
"Dear Lord, I pray for Wisdom, to understand a man, to love and to forgive him; And for patience, for his moods. Because Lord, if I pray for Strength... I'll just beat him to death."
Caution: If your sarcasm is too effective, you might be beaten up instead... legal or not.
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You can stay single and be miserable,Or get married and wish you were dead.
When a woman steals your husband,there is no better revenge than to let her keep him.
Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life
thinking they had no faults at all.
At a cocktail party, one woman said to another,
'Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?'
'Yes, I am. I married the wrong man.'
First guy says, 'My wife's an angel!'
Second guy remarks, 'You're lucky, mine's still alive.'
A young son asked,
'Is it true Dad, that in some parts of Africaa man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?'
Dad replied, 'That happens in every country, son.'
A little boy asked his father,
'Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?'
Father replied, 'I don't know yet son, I'm still paying.'
If you want your spouse to listen and
pay strict attention to every word you say -- talk in your sleep.
A Woman's Prayer:
"Dear Lord, I pray for Wisdom, to understand a man, to love and to forgive him; And for patience, for his moods. Because Lord, if I pray for Strength... I'll just beat him to death."
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