Things we take for granted...

The following is a transcript of an essay in Bahasa Malaysia written by a student in one of our schools. Sentences in brackets were cancelled by his teacher and those in italics were comments by him or her.

The problem faced by the student, obviously from a broken family, of having to write about his unhappy family, reminds me of the advertisement showing an orphan in school who could just grin and distract others because she knows nothing of her family.

“Keluarga saya”

Semua orang didunia ini ada keluarga.

(Keluarga ialah family di dalam bahasa orang putih.)

Keluarga mempunyai ayah, ibu, Abang, kakak, adek, nenek, datuk, pak cik, mak cik (dan etc etc)

(Pertama kali saya ingin memberitahu bahawa semua orang didunia ini mempunyai keluarga yang aman dan damai dan tidak beperang tetapi ada juga yang tidak damai kerana mereka berperang.)

Saya ingin menceritakan pula tentang keluarga saya. Saya mempunyai seorang ibu dan ayah tetapi ibu saya kata dia pernah tidur dengan tiga orang lelaki di hotel dimana dengan itu sah bahawa saya ini anak luar nikah kerana darah saya berlain jenis dengan ayah saya yang ada dirumah ini. Ayah tidak peduli bila ibu keluar dengan lelaki lain. Ibu pula tidak risau jika ayah tidah pulang kerumah walaupun hampir satu bulan.

(Kakak dan abang saya tidak lagi bersekolah kerana mereka sudah berhenti.
Kakak saya cantik seperti mirip wajah Marilyn Monroe yang sudah mati itu.
Dia mati kerana terlanggar motokar datuk saya yang enjinnya berkuasa 500cc.)
Cerita keluar daripada topik

Abang saya handsome atau kacak seperti Amitabh Bachan atau Sanjay Dutt. Kadang2
berubah seperti Aacapan bila dia baru bangun tidur. Bila dia habis mandi muka dia macam muka dia sendiri. Itulah kelebihan abang saya.

Seterusnya saya menceritakan tentang adik saya. Walaupun saya tidak ada adik tetapi saya tipu kamu dengan mengatakan bahawa saya ada adik.

Demikianlah cerita tentang keluarga saya bahagia walaupun sebenarnya tidak. (Sekian harap maklum)

Yang ikhlas,
Bob
Dalam karangan biasa tidak perlu menggunakan bahasa diri
Ianya Cuma untuk ‘surat rasmi’

2 ½ / 100 (marks given)

***

My translation for those who do not understand Bahasa Malaysia:

My Family

Everyone in this world has a family.

(“Keluarga” means “family” in white man’s language)

Family consists of father, mother, older brother, sister, younger brother/sister, grandmother, grandfather, uncles, aunts (and etc etc)

(First, I wish to tell that everyone in this world has a family which is peaceful while there are others which are not peaceful and at war)

I wish to tell the story about my family. I have a mother and a father but my mother said she had slept with three different men in a hotel which confirmed that I am born out of wedlock and my blood type is different from the father who is in this house. Father does not care if mother went out with other men. Mother also does not worry if father did not come back for a month.

(My elder sister and brother are no longer studying because they have stopped. My elder sister is beautiful and looks like Marilyn Monroe the one who was dead. She died because of accident with my grandfather’s motorcar with engine of 500cc.) Story out of context
My elder brother is handsome and looks like Amitabh Bachan or Sanjay Dutt. Sometimes changes and he looks like Aacapan when he gets up from bed. After having his shower he looks his natural self. That is my brother’s ability.

Then I am going to tell about my younger brother. Even though I do not have a younger brother, I lied about my having a younger brother.

That’s all about my happy family, but not in reality.