We have seen enough examples of how some people end up in old age. Yet try as we may, sometimes, we do not have a choice. While age advances, we will certainly lose control of our health and everything else, slowly but surely, sooner or later.
Someone had actually drawn a list of what to do when growing old...
WHEN WE ARE OLD, WHOM DO WE DEPEND ON?
Ourselves, ourselves, only ourselves,
(The truth, as disclosed by a group of old folks).
"Have your own abode. No matter what, do not lose it, until your death!
If you have an old companion, keep each other good company.
Watch your health while it is still good.
Maintain a positive outlook and you will be happy.
Now, our health is still good, our mind still clear.
But on whom can we depend in our old age?
We will have to analyse in various stages.
1st Stage:
Just after retirement, between 60 to 70 yrs old,
Our health will still be comparatively good
So too our financial means.
Eat moderately while we have the means
At times, wear what we fancy
Those who like it, have some fun.
Do not be hard on yourself
Our days are numbered
So, grasp the opportunity.
Have some savings !
Keep the house !
Make arrangements for the days ahead or retreat.
If the kids are well off,
It is their business ...
If the kids are filial
They have good traits ....
We need neither decline financial help from our kids
Nor decline their respect.
But we should remain independent and
Live our own life well.
2nd Stage:
If no mishap and illness strike after we are 70,
We will still be able to take care of ourselves.
Not a major problem.
However, we must realise we are really getting old
Gradually, our body and mind will give way.
Our reflex will slow down with time ...
We will have to eat slowly, to avoid choking.
We will have to walk slowly, to avoid falls.
We can no longer put on a front, we have to look after ourselves!
Do not meddle anymore with this and that, or control the kids!
Some even interfere with the third generation !!!
We have intervened our entire life,
It is time for us to be a little selfish .....
Take hold of ourselves.
Life must come full circle.
Help with the cleaning chores ....
Try to maintain our health for as long as possible.
Give ourselves more opportunities to take control of our own life .....
We lead an easier life when we do not have to solicit help from others .....
3rd Stage:
Our health begins to fail ....
We have to request help from others ....
We have to be mentally prepared for it.
The majority of us cannot escape this hurdle.
We have to prepare ourselves, emotionally, to accept that:-
In life, living and aging, sickness and death are milestones we have to encounter.
This is the final stage in life .....
Nothing to fear!
Be prepared for it in advance and we will not be too depressed.
Either check into a private nursing home ...
Or an old folks home ....
Depending on affordability, of course.
There must be a way out ....
The idea is not to add to the kids' burden, emotionally, increase their chores & their financial commitments.
Try our best to overcome -
What hardship has our generation not endured?
What disasters have we not experienced?
Trust us to take life's last lap in our stride.
4th Stage:
Our mind is still clear, but
We are terminally ill,
When our quality of life has deteriorated drastically...
We must be courageous enough to face death!
Insist that the family not try to prolong our life ....
Do not incur unnecessary expenditure .
WHEN WE ARE OLD, WHOM DO WE DEPEND ON:
Ourselves, Ourselves, only Ourselves ... Amen"
On the other hand, here is an example of someone young but in a state of helplessness, which might refute the last statement on not trying to prolong life:
http://m.mix1023.com.au/m/news/mother-in-coma-heard-everything-was-petrified-theyd-turn-off-life-support
I notice some main changes in our traditional views. For eg. living in old folks home used to be a 'no-no' for Chinese because it gives the impression that the children are not filial and cannot spare the time to look after their parent. But in today's society, the more successful the children are, the less time they can spare for the family... unless, they are rich enough not having to work for others or can delegate the running of their businesses to others.
The other main change is where to have the funeral wake. Again, not having one's own house for this was considered shameful before, as it gave the impression the family cannot afford to own a house. But with today's concern for security and convenience, the funeral parlour seems to be the top choice of very wealthy families. Having the wake at home means opening the house to all and sundy, during a time of general confusion within the grieving families. This can pose a security problem and there were cases of those with criminal intent, browsing obituary notices just to get the necessary details for action. There were actual reports of donations and visitors being robbed during funeral wake or bereaved families being extorted.
Link
Someone had actually drawn a list of what to do when growing old...
WHEN WE ARE OLD, WHOM DO WE DEPEND ON?
Ourselves, ourselves, only ourselves,
(The truth, as disclosed by a group of old folks).
"Have your own abode. No matter what, do not lose it, until your death!
If you have an old companion, keep each other good company.
Watch your health while it is still good.
Maintain a positive outlook and you will be happy.
Now, our health is still good, our mind still clear.
But on whom can we depend in our old age?
We will have to analyse in various stages.
1st Stage:
Just after retirement, between 60 to 70 yrs old,
Our health will still be comparatively good
So too our financial means.
Eat moderately while we have the means
At times, wear what we fancy
Those who like it, have some fun.
Do not be hard on yourself
Our days are numbered
So, grasp the opportunity.
Have some savings !
Keep the house !
Make arrangements for the days ahead or retreat.
If the kids are well off,
It is their business ...
If the kids are filial
They have good traits ....
We need neither decline financial help from our kids
Nor decline their respect.
But we should remain independent and
Live our own life well.
2nd Stage:
If no mishap and illness strike after we are 70,
We will still be able to take care of ourselves.
Not a major problem.
However, we must realise we are really getting old
Gradually, our body and mind will give way.
Our reflex will slow down with time ...
We will have to eat slowly, to avoid choking.
We will have to walk slowly, to avoid falls.
We can no longer put on a front, we have to look after ourselves!
Do not meddle anymore with this and that, or control the kids!
Some even interfere with the third generation !!!
We have intervened our entire life,
It is time for us to be a little selfish .....
Take hold of ourselves.
Life must come full circle.
Help with the cleaning chores ....
Try to maintain our health for as long as possible.
Give ourselves more opportunities to take control of our own life .....
We lead an easier life when we do not have to solicit help from others .....
3rd Stage:
Our health begins to fail ....
We have to request help from others ....
We have to be mentally prepared for it.
The majority of us cannot escape this hurdle.
We have to prepare ourselves, emotionally, to accept that:-
In life, living and aging, sickness and death are milestones we have to encounter.
This is the final stage in life .....
Nothing to fear!
Be prepared for it in advance and we will not be too depressed.
Either check into a private nursing home ...
Or an old folks home ....
Depending on affordability, of course.
There must be a way out ....
The idea is not to add to the kids' burden, emotionally, increase their chores & their financial commitments.
Try our best to overcome -
What hardship has our generation not endured?
What disasters have we not experienced?
Trust us to take life's last lap in our stride.
4th Stage:
Our mind is still clear, but
We are terminally ill,
When our quality of life has deteriorated drastically...
We must be courageous enough to face death!
Insist that the family not try to prolong our life ....
Do not incur unnecessary expenditure .
WHEN WE ARE OLD, WHOM DO WE DEPEND ON:
Ourselves, Ourselves, only Ourselves ... Amen"
On the other hand, here is an example of someone young but in a state of helplessness, which might refute the last statement on not trying to prolong life:
http://m.mix1023.com.au/m/news/mother-in-coma-heard-everything-was-petrified-theyd-turn-off-life-support
I notice some main changes in our traditional views. For eg. living in old folks home used to be a 'no-no' for Chinese because it gives the impression that the children are not filial and cannot spare the time to look after their parent. But in today's society, the more successful the children are, the less time they can spare for the family... unless, they are rich enough not having to work for others or can delegate the running of their businesses to others.
The other main change is where to have the funeral wake. Again, not having one's own house for this was considered shameful before, as it gave the impression the family cannot afford to own a house. But with today's concern for security and convenience, the funeral parlour seems to be the top choice of very wealthy families. Having the wake at home means opening the house to all and sundy, during a time of general confusion within the grieving families. This can pose a security problem and there were cases of those with criminal intent, browsing obituary notices just to get the necessary details for action. There were actual reports of donations and visitors being robbed during funeral wake or bereaved families being extorted.
No comments:
Post a Comment