Old text brings back old memories

Virus, or more likely, worm, attack had taken its toll on my old faithful. Had been tolerating with constraints of no Outlook Express, no forwarding of page from website and so on, my computer finally could not even start at times or hang immediately after.

So while others were enjoying broadband or Wifi, skyppe or video-conferencing, I was in a world of my own, making do with 3.9mb of space to receive emails as provided by generous Tmnet. Many have complained their emails were bounced back because my mailbox was full with just a couple of attachments. I am only slightly better than those who would not even go near a computer.

The offer of a free HP desktop if you sign up for 2-year streamyx @ Rm99pm came and gone. I was and am still hoping that an offer of a free notebook is coming soon! Anyway, the cheapest notebook so far is a Toshiba at Rm1,799 and this will be my standard for comparison purposes. The other reason was that the technology is advancing so fast that I felt I might regret signing up for 2 years during which time, wifi or similar technology might be able to offer a practical option without the present limitations.

In the meantime, I am using my son’s old desktop and carry on with my stone age technology. Was glad for a while that I could transfer the internal modem and got it working. Found some old emails and texts which I still find interesting. Deleted most to clear space because of the small memory. Recently, I mentioned about Cheng’s exchange experience and I reproduce the text of my speech before I delete:-

Distinguished Rotarians, ladies and gentlemen. I am honoured to be invited to share my experience as a parent of an exchange student in Japan.

When my daughter, Cheng, first asked me whether I would allow her to go on an international exchange programme, I was really concerned and worried. She was only 17 then and it was only natural that I was feeling uneasy having to face this problem so soon.

Having thought about it that night, I decided that the best option was to leave it to fate. I told her that if she managed to get the offer, then I would allow her to go. This was meant to be a delay tactic on my part yet a chance for her to prove herself in front of a panel of interviewers comprising senior Rotarians.

Well, she managed to convince them that she was most suitable as the Ipoh Rotary Club was sending only one in year 2001.

To those parents who are having misgivings about sending their children for this purpose - in my opinion, if the child is seriously interested, has the determination to go through it, has an out-going personality, and can be selected by a panel of independent persons, he or she has already passed the test. It is a chance of a lifetime as at that age, the world is just opening up and it will be an invaluable experience which money cannot buy.

Besides learning Japanese language, culture, history and so on, she will be learning how to live with different families which will make her learn how to be adaptable, kind and considerate. The Japanese are known for being polite and kind to their guests. Cheng was treated very well by her 4 main host families. Honestly, from her account of her stay with her host families, I really had peace of mind, knowing that she was in really good hands.

The fact that 2 couples actually took the trouble to visit her in Malaysia showed that she had won their hearts as well. One of them, Mr. Fujioka was an Executive Director of Proton, representing Mitsubishi Corporation during the period 1988 to 1992. To show their hospitality, during their visit recently, at the Smokehouse in Cameron Highlands, they booked another room for their daughter, so that Cheng could sleep in the extra room (originally meant for their daughter) within their large suite! To make sure she would not forget her Japanese, he even introduced her to Dato Kato, who is a permanent resident here and was founder of Nippon Denso.

The main concern of parents is the loss of 1 academic year. After secondary school, 1 year can easily be lost by not doing well in Form 6, “A” levels, Matriculation or Foundation courses. Only those who are very particular about their children sticking to their expectations of straight As and scholarships and nothing else, will feel that the loss of 1 academic year will derail their hopes. They will not consider this exceptional experience as worthwhile or worth the risk.

Yes, I must agree that the student will change, but in my opinion, for the better. At this age, everyone will change, and most parents have problems accepting this!

Yes, after having missed one full year of rote learning will make the student lose her previous momentum of study but at the age of 18 which is also legally the age of maturity, it is about time, she is given the chance to decide for herself what she wants in her life.

As parents, sometimes we are put in a dilemma. When my daughter decides on something against my wish, I have to consider whether I am being selfish if I disagree. So long as it is morally right and legal, I let her decide. I rather have a happy daughter who is close to me and can communicate with me, than a hostile one who rather run away from home and hate me for the rest of her life. Sometimes, to think of it, we don’t really have a choice!

Thank you.