BN's ills...

put in medical terms (by a pseudo doctor?) but good for a laugh when campaigning in a by-election:

MEDICAL REPORT CARD

To help BN with this task, the following medical report has been prepared to identify the diseases/illnesses that have been plaguing it and how these ailments have caused this sickening organization to become so sick that major surgery is now being considered.

Diagnosis

Overeating – gorged themselves and ate too much of the people's money

Heart failure – did not have a heart to really care about the rakyat

Rectal cancer and constipation – did not expel all the shit from the system

Diabetes – fondness for sweet things, i.e. saying sweet things to try and con the rakyat ( in plain English, lying)

Stroke – stroked too much of their own ego and became too arrogant

Overworking – too busy running here and there cutting deals for own benefit

Alzheimer's – forgot to play the proper role of an elected representative

Obsessive-compulsive neurosis – obsession with cleaning, especially sweeping things under the carpet

HP6 – a mutation of the deadly H5N1 ( bird flu) virus which manifests itself in the form of idiocy or semi-idiocy, thus the descriptor ' half past six ( HP6)'. Many members of the BN are infected.

VD – Very Deaf. Did not listen to the grievances of the rakyat and did not heed the healthy advice and feedback from bloggers.

Color Blind – a form of visual impairment which is directly the opposite of being color blind. There is a fixation on color and everything must always be discussed in terms of 'color' – Malay, Chinese, Indian etc.

Liver problems – failure to de-Liver on promises

'Inverted Cerebranus ' – a new form of disease where the cerebrum and anus are transposed causing highly irrational and objectionable behaviour, like brandishing ancient weapons and ranting racial slurs and threats

Prognosis

Not good and definitely a terminal case.
Chances of recovery are about the same odds as Osama converting to the Jewish faith and becoming a messenger of world peace.

Cure

No known cure. Euthanasia recommended.
Suggest to drink lacquer – at least it will ensure a beautiful finish.

By Political doctor


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