It's been a warmer week in Luxembourg and all of us are busy wrapping up our last deadlines here while packing whatever possible before Friday. Yes, the 'big day' for the 17 of us moving to Leuven takes place on Friday.
Does dealing with data detach oneself from the 'real' world? I was ruminating on this while wasting away another sleepless night. I figure not. Like many and even the most mundane things in life, we can often draw from them various analogies to life.
Here at the research institute, we basically deal with two types of data. Panel/Longitudinal data and cross-sectional data. The first involves surveying the same individuals or collecting country-level data over time (a good example is census data). The latter is made up of one-time data collection, which means you get 'snapshots' of what is going on (whether it is the socio-economic conditions, level of democracy, and so on) at that point in time.
Travelling and living abroad give me many 'snapshots' cross-sectional information. However, I sorely miss out on valuable information that requires spending more time at one place.
In Prague, I was struck by a comment in former US Secretary of State, Madeleine Albright's biography. It was about her girlish accent in Czech, frozen in time when her family fled former Czechoslovakia to the US in the late 1940s. I was reminded of Fujioka-san's advice for me to pick up proper Japanese (which I never did) instead of indulging in the vocabulary of a Japanese high school girl in 2001. My 'snapshot' view of Japan and everything Japanese is frozen in time and particular to having been in a Japanese high school while living with upper-middle class Japanese families in Tokyo.
Closer to home, I have yet to experience having a full-time job in Malaysia. Embarrassingly, my knowledge on Malaysian taxation, employment policies, etc is as good as any other who has read a book/website pertaining to that. My relationship with many good friends back home is stunted by the fact that I am physically not there with them when they experience university life, graduation, their first job, long-term relationships, and so forth.
Judging from your experiences, I reckon that the 'panel' bit will come naturally when I finally settle down and find my 'base' (social network). Meantime, it's about those little 'snapshots' of different places and people. Perhaps even, if I am lucky, salvaging the few lasting friendships that are meant to survive the distance and time apart.
Surely, this is when family (especially the parents!) comes in. I don't believe that human beings are meant to survive purely on 'cross-sectional' relationships.
Thank you for those weekly phone calls, Pa and Ma!!! =.)
lots of love,
cheng
The mention of her student days in Japan reminds me of my agonizing hours in trying to decide whether to allow her to study there for 1 year under the Rotary International Student Exchange programme, after finishing Form 5. Besides the usual ‘kiasu’ worry over her skipping 1 year of study here, I was least prepared to make such a decision when she was only 17. Anyway, I felt if it was fated then I should leave it to the panel to decide who should be the only one to go for that year! I also mentioned in my speech at another Rotary Club meeting in KL (as a parent with a child under the exchange programme) that I did not really have a choice as I did not want her to hate me for the rest of my life! There is a saying:
If you love someone...let her go.
If she comes back to you she is yours.
If she doesn't, then she never was.
Though this is more appropriate for a boy-girl relationship, it comes to mind, and I think it is suitable in the bonding sense between parent and child. Physically, she might be away, it is the natural and sincere love (not under compulsion nor obligation), and longing to communicate that we most value these days.
My mum used to say to us in Hokien, "lai tong siu, khe put liu" which meant "I will accept you when you come but I will not stop you if you go" and I think she was wise then.
Incidentally, Fujioka was formerly a director of Proton, representing Mitsubishi Corp. from 1988 to 1992. They visited us after Cheng finished her year in Japan.
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